Streets of Philadelphia … A Visual Diary … Page 12 “On The Turning Away”


It is that every now and then I feel detached from my work, well, maybe from life itself. See, if I get detached from life, I always had my work to keep me in touch with things. Kinda like a life line. The scary thing for me is not being detached from life but when I start to detach from my work. It’s my thread to existence. It’s what I do in reality and it’s for life. So if I let myself detach, poof!

So in these times of the image wasteland I struggle to even find meaning in what I’m doing. I guess I push myself to the street and endeavor to persevere my journey. I walk around in a general feeling of apathy and I lose interest quickly. …and during all this self generated pity and lackadaisical attitude, I still go work. I still push myself to seek my next image. Am I a hero, fuck no I’m just an aware shooter that knows in time, things may pass.

When I was young I knew things would pass but now as a seasoned human, I don’t take the passing for granted anymore.  I want it to pass but now know only I can make it do so. That or a great camera store… nah, I got all I need.



So maybe it’s nothing that will pass by itself this image wasteland I am traveling thru. Maybe it’s the Turning Away that is happening. The problem is to recognize where the Turning Away is happening.

Maybe it’s me doing the turning away from my work and efforts and just maybe I am complacent with my region I choose to work, or maybe it’s the vision of the lens, or maybe emotionally I am drained and weak and not up to the task, or maybe a million other things I may be Turning Away from.

What if it wasn’t totally me at all?  I mean life is not just a 2 way street, it’s also a shared street. So what if I am punishing myself because I feel I am at fault completely but, maybe, just maybe life is playing a role in this dance thru the image wasteland with me. What if life is smarter then me, imagine that, and trying to mentor me to take things to the next level and because it’s the next level, I have no conscious awareness of it because I ain’t there yet so maybe that’s why I feel lost cause I am actually lost cause I am entering a new region unaware to me.

Well. I’m gonna take Walker the Olympus Pen-5 out again with the trusty 25mm 1.8. This is not my preferred focal length but in these times of uncertainty, I need to unload as many preconceptions as I can. ufff not easy.

I’ll be back in a day or so and I would appreciate some comments to share… thanks all…..

shooter and his mind…out……………………………………………………………………………

20 thoughts on “Streets of Philadelphia … A Visual Diary … Page 12 “On The Turning Away””

  1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts Don. Just be sure that there are many fellow shooters out here on similar journeys of their own … with their own detours and forks in the road of life. I like the thought that things will be going to the next level – even though you/we may not be aware of what that is at the present. So, just persevere … there are so many images out there waiting to be discovered and shared. I say that to you … and myself. And as far as that camera store goes … I too have all I need – but the urge to get another camera/lens keeps surfacing. Anyway Don … take care. Looking forward to your next post.

    1. Daven thanks again. Ya know Flickr shows me what’s going on with ppl. I mean I see shooters with hundreds of likes and some with very little. I also check how frequent ppl post shots. For me, this is the curve in photography today. It shows me how ppl struggle to continue shooting and that they are dedicated to that. It shows me that no matter what others think about ones work, they continue maybe not 100% sure but they continue to work.

      What does this have to do with my current situation? Well, I get inspired from my friends. Not from books or DVD’s but from my friends. The struggle to survive is the struggle I have now and looking at my friends work…. can’t finish, gotta hit the streets……

      busy with camera in hand for a few days……………………………………….

    1. Pavel, ya know that’s my thoughts exactly. My wife will return next Thursday from Russia and I haven’t done shit since she left. I plan on getting some night work in this weekend. Thanks my friend.

  2. hi don

    i’d say “hang in there,” but it’s obvious you are an old hand at that…
    i know what you mean about “life playing a role.” people, things, and places do not only play a role in our lives, we play a role in theirs as well. now if the director would only give us a peek at the script, so we knew what our next line was, we could play our part better. but hey, this is all experimental theater! all we can do is show up, look for our mark, and act, react, and repeat. and release all expectations at the same time. not easy.


    1. Marke
      Good to hear from you. Yes, life plays a role in our daily lives and it seems to be doing things I wasn’t expecting in mine. Not saying it’s good or bad but thanks to you, I now know I can blame the director for my mistakes. That sob, no script and when the casting call came told me I have the role. Never knew I applied but it’s a nice play this life is. I think I’ll photograph it for a while even without a script……

      Thanks pal, be blessed…….don

  3. It’s basically writer’s block for photographers, right? Photographers block. Sometimes getting away from your usual surrounding, even for a day or so, can be just what you need. It makes the old seem new again.

    1. Tina, you are soooo right. It is shooters block and I am taking steps to tear down this wall… dunno what those steps are but I’m doing it.
      Thanks, be blessed Tina……

  4. Interesting Don about your wife being gone … mine has been in Japan for a month and still has another month to go. And like you … I haven’t done shit. Well, I am working full time … but as far as photography goes … haven’t got out like I thought I was going to do. Have also thought about doing some evening/night stuff. Look forward to seeing if you get some good night shots. Be careful out there at night though.

    1. Dave,
      It’s the inverse square law again Dave. The more free time we have the less we do and the less free time the more we do. Back at the turn of the century I was seriously considering using the 50mm FOV. I felt that the 50mm crop would awaken something in me but never pursued it. Now for the last few weeks I’ve been using the Pen 5 and the 25 1.8. I have to admit, it’s a challenge but I’m up for it.
      Anyway, have a blessed journey Dave, seeya out there… well, I’d like to but da wifey will be here in 4 days and I gotta clean the house, do laundry, mow the lawn, tend the garden, find the cat hmmmmmmm

      1. Ya Don, I spend almost 2 months trashing/neglecting the place and then the last weekend I have to clean and put it all back together. So far I haven’t misplaced the cat. OK … I will leave you to your cleaning.

        1. Dave, hahaha, I get that for sure. I found the cat he was 27 lbs but now 6…lol. I didn’t realize he needs to eat?

      2. Don, I notice you’ve been using the EP5. I have been toying with the idea of getting one. BH is selling a kit with the VF4 View Finder and Oly 18 1.7 lens. Do you use yours with the external VF? Already have the EPL5 … maybe I should just get the VF4 VF. Yes – I’m suffering from another bout of G.A.S.

        1. Dave, I really prefer screen cameras and always have. I have a finder for it, used it for a few minutes and put it away.The screen is the most efficient method of viewing, so I use that. The Pen 5 is an amazing camera I am totally enthralled with it. The Pen cameras are about as intuitive and they have a way of sparking creative energy. The Pen 5 takes that all the way.

          1. Dave, don’t post it anywhere on the net. Wives all pool together and file reports on hubby’s spending procedures.
            Great camera, by far and wide, my favorite.

  5. I’m sure you will come through this block, possibly with a new creative vision. Meanwhile, don’t sweat it. Let time do its thing. We all need a break now and then.

    1. Jordi, thanks. I seem to be out of the fog and look forward o seeing new light… all this without buying a camera… amazing.

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